I Am From Virginia

You Know You're From Virginia When...

• Speed limits are just suggestions
• You have at least two friends who have no idea what their relatives do...because its "top secret" government work
• Most of your senior class wend to Mason, JMU, Tech, VCU or UVA
  
• You've never told someone you're from Virginia without putting "northern," "central," or "southern" in front of it
• It's not actually tailgating unless your bumper is touching the car in front of you.
• You know yellow light means at least 5 more cars can get through. (Yeah, man...at least. Probably also happens everywhere else.) A red light means 2 more can.
• You actually know what the black boxes at stoplights are for.
• You took a field trip to Williamsburg as a kid
• You or someone in your family has a Smart Tag
• An inch of snow and you miss 3 days of school
• All the potholes just add a little excitement to your driving experience
• Crown Victoria = undercover cop
• Subway is a fast food place. The transportation system is known as Metro, and only Metro.
• If you stay on the same road long enough, it will eventually have three new names.
• You have never been served tea without the waitress asking "sweet or unsweetened?"
• Your favorite past time is telling West Virginia jokes.
• Anyone who can't trace his or her ancestry back to at least four generations in Virginia is an outsider.
• "Going to the beach" means anywhere from Ocean City to Virginia Beach to Myrtle Beach.
• You measure distance in minutes
• You use "fix" as a verb. Example: I'm fixin' to go to the store
• You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit "a little warm"
• You know there are three type of summer weather: Hot, hazy, and humid (with the occasional thunderstorm thrown in there just for good measure)
  
• You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Virginia.

I am from Virginia. I am a southerner, and I am proud of my heritage. My college loyalty is to Virginia Tech, and now, more recently, JMU (though I swear I bleed Chicago Maroon and Burnt Orange). My high schools couldn't have been more different, despite the fact that they were thirty minutes away from each other, but I didn't mind going to either. Belle Isle and Maymont Park are two of my favorite places, but I hate going "north of the river." Despite that, Carytown is one of the best places to shop, and the closest mall to my house is about 45 minutes away. Paying tolls means paying fifty-cents, and without my SmartTag, I'd be hopelessly lost, missing on the first throw. I do believe that speed limits are only suggestions, but I also abide by George Carlin's quote of "anyone going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster is a maniac." I have tailgated, been tailgated and probably will have both occur sometime soon. I applied to four out of the 5 major colleges here in Virginia (UVA, VT, W&M and JMU) and planned on attending one of those four. Both of my parents came from Smalltown, VA, but I still love going back there and visiting family. Speaking of family, mine is very large and close. I have more cousins than I can count on my fingers and toes combined, and the number of second cousins I have is beginning to creep close to that. And yes, people, I have been to a family reunion (and enjoyed most of it too). To me, Ukrops was more than just a grocery store- it was a way of life, and I will miss it dearly when they're gone. Yes, the school system here sucks, as do the SOLs, and some of the teachers, but hey- I got my education. My neighborhood is small, but tight-knit. And a year-and-a-half ago, I was so ready to get out of there... out of the house, out of the county... I was ready to leave. But when I got to college, I realized that I was no longer the big fish in a small pond, but now I was a tiny fish in a huge pond. As time goes on, though, I stop and reminisce about my time spent at home and everything that went on there. One day, I dreamed of getting out of Virginia and moving on to something bigger... something better. And maybe that will happen. All I know is that Virginia is home and I love it. And one day, when I'm older (and wiser), maybe when I'm about to graduate, I'll look back on those memories. I'll remember my hometown, and everything I used to hate about it. And all those things will seem nice. I might hate everything about it now, but I know that one day I'll be saying, "Those were the best days of my life, and I can't wait to go home."

It's Basic Economics

Dear Obama,

Please take a college course in Economics before you decide to give or make anymore fiscal decisions/advice. In fact, don't just take one course. Go ahead and get an entire degree in Economics!

You tell us you're going to bail us out of the current economic rut we're in. And then you turn around and spend over 1.1 trillion (yes, trillion!) dollars on things like your inauguration, bailing corporate companies out and stimulus checks. The thing is, all this money you're getting is tax money. And all the tax money is coming primarily from the middle class people. Guess who makes up a majority of society, Obama? That's right: Middle class workers.

It's basic economics, Obama. If you do not have the money, then you cannot spend it. In personal finance terms, it's called over drafting. And if you're someone like me, an average middle class citizen, it's something that can get you thrown in jail for what's called "check fraud."

You wonder why the banks are floundering and many are going under. Perhaps it is because they don't have enough money. They cannot afford to give out anymore loans, especially to people who aren't going to pay them back. In fact, it's lending like that, like what you're calling for, that's gotten us into this current fiscal mess as it is! Just take a look at history. It's plain as day. Don't try to say the Republicans caused this mess when it's your Democratic policies from the 1980s that did this.

Speaking of history, have you heard of this thing called Keyensian economics? Yeah, that whole idea of if you spend a lot of money, more money than you have, then you'll get your economy back in order? It's only a quick fix. Keyensian economics will never work. It didn't work for Europe. Why do you think it will work for us? Sure, it's worked for the past few decades, but now look where we are. We're a politically and fiscally unstable country full of middle-class workers who are starting to get rather disgruntled.

Open your eyes, Obama. Look around you. Learn some basic economics and history. Once you do that, then you can consider talking to us about what you want us to do with our money. Until then, I highly recommend you keep your mouth shut. Obviously you know nothing about what you're taking about. Like the old adage goes, "it's better to remain silent and appear a fool than to open your mouth and confirm it."

Sincerely,
A Concerned American With Some Common Sense

PS: If you keep going the way you're going and keep attempting to tax the middle class more, you can rest assured that you're going to lose their vote in the 2012 presidential elections. Just thought I'd point that out to you.

"Battle Studies" -A Review

As a fan of John Mayer's, I've followed him throughout his career. I distinctly remember the poppy, almost bubble-gummy feel of Room For Squares. Then he released Heavier Things, which had a more rocky, edgier feel to it. Later, we got Continuum, which showed a new stage of evolution in Mayer's songwriting. Continuum had a very bluesy feel to it... it felt real. Today, Mayer released his fourth studio album entitled Battle Studies, and I'll admit it- this album is very different. It's not what I expected from Mr. Mayer. So, here's my take on it.

1. Heartbreak Warfare: This is probably my favorite track on this album. It's got layered guitars that almost has a U2 feel to it, and lyrics that are incredibly poignant. I really like Mayer's comparison of love to warfare; while I know that the two are in no way similar, the imagery sticks with you. I also love the bluntness with which this song is written (ex: the line "If you want more love why don't you say so?) It's such a perfect tale of love and the trials that come with it.

2. All We Ever Do is Say Goodbye: This is a simple song with almost a minimalist feeling to it. Acoustic guitars over a piano, drums and bass guitar with Mayer's voice floating over it... it's definitely a different style for him. However, it kind of feels like something's missing... it doesn't exactly feel full enough. I'm not quite sure what it is about it, but I feel this track is a little weak.

3. Half of my Heart: When I first heard this song, I thought I was listening to a country song. And then Taylor Swift began singing. I was blown away! Their voices blend very well, but I feel that for a duet, Swift just didn't exactly get her chance to truly shine on what could be a wonderful song. Don't get me wrong- I do like this song. Once again, it's a very different sound for Mayer, and it's not exactly something I was expecting to hear from him. But all in all, it's a pretty good song.

4. Who Says: Yes, it's a song about everyone's favorite subject! No, not sex. Pot. Indeed, Mayer wrote a song about smoking weed, talking about his personal opinions about the drug (and his possible use). Now, I personally don't really like the message of this song, nor do I really like the song in general. It just feels too short. Personally, probably one of the worst tracks on here.

5. Perfectly Lonely: Now, this song sounds a little more like his previous works. It's got a pretty bluesy intro, and fairly typical Mayer lyrics that talk about his love life, or lackthereof in this case. But I like this song, probably because of the familiarity of it. It sounds full, with just enough of everything in it. And I like the message of independence that's being passed along... the idea of being cool with being single, but also accepting the fact that he knows one day he'll find someone. In general, I like this song. It's pretty good.

6. Assassin: This song definitely doesn't sound like anything we've heard from Mayer before, but it's cool. I like it, personally, and think it's a sound he can definitely pull off. I love the groovy bass line that seems to kind of drive this song, as well as that xylophone (I'm assuming that's what it is) that is played. I also like this lyrics of this song. They're very interesting. From what I understand, it's about a one-night-stand, or something like that. It's a tale that's poetically told, though, with an interesting comparison to the lovers being assassins. This song definitely has a cool funky, and though I used this word before, groovy feel to it. It's something that you can just kind of bob your head to... dance to a little bit. This is another one of my favorite songs on this album.

7. Crossroads: I've heard the original version of this song done by Robert Johnson, and I liked that. I've also heard the version Eric Clapton did with Cream, and I loved that. I also saw a live performance with Clapton and Mayer doing this song, and I thought that was absolutely wonderful! But this version? Ehhh... not so much. In fact, I really don't like this version at all. There's just something about it that I don't like. Maybe it's all the harmonies that are layered over a simple melody. Maybe it's the strange sound of the lead guitar. I'm not sure what it is. But I just do not like this song. In fact, this was the song I was looking forward to the most, and it was just a huge let down. Basically, I really just... yeah. Don't like this version of what could be a great song.

8. War of my Life: This song is Ok. It's just kinda got a soft feeling that I'm not exactly used to hearing from Mayer. But I like the lyrics, especially the line "If fear hasn't killed me yet/ then nothing will." It's a good song, with a very mellow feeling to it. I'm still warming up to it, though.

9. Edge of Desire: This is a kind of slow, almost ballad-type of a song. I'm sure how I feel about the vocals on this track; they almost seem a little stressed or strained. But I like this words. The chorus is blunt; the last line in it almost feels like a suckerpunch to me ("There I just said it / I'm scared you'll forget about me") This song seems to speak to anyone who's been in a relationship and has had a major fight or problem with their significant other, and I love that. It's a song that almost anyone can relate to. It's also an incredibly passionate, moving song. Once again, this is a track that I really like.

10. Do You Know Me: This is another one of those quick little songs on this album. I kind of like this, but it just feels so short. I like the guitar that's played on it, though. But... it's just so short, it's feels hard to get a grasp on it.

11. Friends, Lovers, or Nothing: I love the piano in this song. I almost love the questions that are posed in this song. It's kinda funny in a way, because I'm pretty sure that almost anyone could relate to this song as well. I do like the style of this song. Once again, it's a style that's different for Mayer, but he makes it work.

Like I've said before, Battle Studies definitely has a totally different sound than any of his other albums. Personally, I find it to be a little lacking. It doesn't sound full enough... it doesn't sound complete. There's just something about it, and I can't quite put my finger on it. Regardless, I think Where The Light Is and Continuum remain tied for the position of my favorite album. This could be a really good album with a little more work, but for now, it's just not doing it for me. I'm hoping that if I listen to it some more, it'll rub off on me. I don't know. I guess we'll see. For now, though, I give Battle Studies 3 out of 5 stars.

What's So Great About Them?

In this day and age, television is readily available for the watching, whether it's On Demand or on your computer. It seems, though, that TV stations are constantly premiering new shows, as if they're unable to find a show that works. I've been watching a few shows for several years now, and personally think they're pretty good. After all, what would NCIS be without Tony DiNozzo? Or Bones without Booth and Brennan? How would Sgt. Colbert survive without Ray Person? The list of questions goes on and on. So, here's a few of my favorite TV show characters, past and present.

Name: Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo
Show: NCIS
Quote: I'm the wild card. You know, the guy who looks at the reality in front of him and refuses to accept it.
What's So Great About Him? Every TV show needs comedic relief, and indeed, DiNozzo fills this role for NCIS. His constant jabs at Special Agent Tim "Probie" McGee and amusing flirtations with former Mossad Liaison Officer (now Special Agent) Ziva David provide a light air to a normally serious show. However, his role goes farther than that. Tony is the Senior Field Agent. He's the guy to turn to when Gibbs isn't available. He sees things in a different light (perhaps from his time spent as a homicide cop and all of Season 4 which was spent with him doing and under cover op), and slowly, but surely, we're seeing his character evolve from the chauvinistic playboy he was in Season 1 to the now complex, slightly more mature, and sometimes dark field agent that he is today. His constant references to old movies may drive you insane to begin with, but scratch a little deeper than the surface, and you'll see that he always comes through in the end.

Names: Dr. Temperance "Bones" Brennan and Special Agent Seeley Booth
Show: Bones
Quote: You see two people and you think they belong together, but nothing happens. The thought of losing so much control over personal happiness is unbearable. You love someone, you open yourself up to suffering, and that's the sad truth. Maybe they'll break your heart, maybe you'll break their heart and never be able to look at yourself in the same way. Those are the risks. That's the burden. Like wings, they have weight, we feel that weight on our backs, but they are a burden that lifts us. Burdens that allow us to fly.
What's So Great About Them? These two are complete opposites, but they show us how other people can fill in our gaps. Bones is a forensic anthropologist who works in conjunction with the FBI via Booth, and in the beginning, all the two do is bicker. However, as the show has progressed, we're being shown more and more about these two. And, indeed, like many shows, this is one of supposedly unrequited love. The ironic thing is, Booth loves Bones, and vice-versa, they're just too dense, or too afraid, to admit or see it. Perfect in their imperfections, though, at the end of the day, they bring out the best in each other.

Names: Sergeant Brad "Iceman" Colbert and Corporal Josh Ray Person
Show: Generation Kill
Quote: Oh, no. Now not only do we have to worry about all the Charms you've eaten, but now Brad's just pissed off God.
What's So Great About Them? Once again, we're greeted with a tail of two opposites thrown in the middle of the same situation. This time, though, it's in the middle of Iraq, during the 2003 invasion. See, Generation Kill was originally a three-part set of articles that was turned int a book published by Evan Wright, a Rolling Stones reporter embedded with this platoon of Marines. HBO turned it into a miniseries, and a pretty good one at that. It focuses on the Humvee that Wright rode in, and these two happened to be in it. Brad Colbert is cool, level-headed and collected, even in the heaviest of battles, thus attributing him his nickname. Josh Ray Person, however, is loud, occasionally obnoxious and rather foul at times. He's self-described as trailer-trash, and more often than not, he gets on the nerves of his fellow Marines instead of helping them. Despite their differences, these two are two of the best people you could ask to have on your platoon. Person is described as being the best RTO in their company, and Brad is looked upon as a heroic figure. These two figures are both self-sacrificing and funny at the same time, as seen when the convoy get's stuck in an ambush one night. Instead of panicking (as I would've done), Colbert begins engaging the enemy while Person gets out of his Humvee and starts yelling at the drivers to "Please! Back the f*** up!" In general, these two men are a wonderful example of a partnership you wouldn't think would work out.

Name: Gabriel Gray/Sylar
Show: Heroes
Quote: Help find a way. Give me salvation. Give me that damn list so I can sink my teeth in! I'm a natural progression of the species. Evolution is a part of nature, and nature kills. Simple, right?
What's So Great About Him? Ahhh... yes. Now we get to the serial killer on my list. Sylar is just... well, he's Sylar. Part tortured soul, part homicidal maniac, all completely amazing. His view of the world is just so incredibly different from anyone else's, it's hard to think that someone like you or I came up with his character. Whether he's telekinetically slicing heads open (and possibly satisfying that cannibalistic urge) or torturing our favorite heroes, he's guaranteed to deliver. After all, he's that villain you love to hate and hate to love.

So, that's my list so far. Perhaps I'll update it and include a few more characters. I'm sure there are plenty out there that deserve recognition. We'll see. In short, I seriously urge you to go and check these shows out. They may very well be worth your time. :)

Ball In Hand

Recently, my friends and I have taken to playing pool every Monday and Thursday night at TDU. It's an interesting game to play (and for those of us like me who never did well in Geometry and/or Trigonometry, it's a challenge). We're not very competitive; and truth be told, none of us are really that good (well... Lauren's a beast, as are Spencer and Logan... maybe it's me who just sucks at this game). It's just a nice way to blow off some stress and have fun.

It's interesting, though, if you look at the game of pool in detail... do more than scratch the surface. See, each time you hit the cue ball, generally speaking, you hit another ball, which could hit a couple of more balls. The entire game is cause and effect. If X occurs, then Y will happen.

Now, what's interesting is if you apply it to real life. See, I think we fail to realize that our actions are that cue ball. We are the billiards player, lining up the shot. There are several different factors affecting our decision as to which ball we hit with the cue ball, such as location of the cue ball, location of the ball we want to hit, and what game we're playing. In the end, though, we hit the cue ball, making our decision, and ultimately changing the fate of someone else.

Sound confusing?

Yeah, I thought so too until I thought about it some more.

See, I think we fail to realize that our decisions affect more than one person. How we live our lives and make our decisions affect people on the outside, too... people like friends and family, or even strangers that we may not know. Just like that billiards player lines up the shot and hits the cue ball, thus affecting the other balls on the table and players, our decisions help progress our lives but also have repercussions outside of ourselves.

When my friends and I play, we have a rule called "ball in hand." Basically, when the person shooting fails to hit a ball, scratches, or hits the wrong ball, the person after them gets to take the cue ball and set it anywhere on the table. I challenge you to be that player who's followed the person who's scratched. How will your actions affect those around you? What consequences, positive or negative, will they have?

The ball's in your hand.

Make your shot.

The Luckiest

I've been going through an interesting stage of life and self-discovery for the past couple of weeks. It's been rather interesting, too. But, I guess I should start from the beginning.

I've never been a very religious person. I mean, I was raised in the Methodist Church, baptized in the Methodist Church, confirmed in the Methodist Church. But, I guess the idea of religion never really took to me... or perhaps I distanced myself from it at some point. Either way, somewhere a long the way, I "stopped being Christian."

Now, this is not to say I was an atheist. No, I wasn't an atheist. I'd say I was more... agnostic. I believed that there was some guiding force out there. I believed that there was some form of intervention. I just wasn't sure what it was.

Perhaps this whole journey began back in my sophomore year of high school. See, I had a Sunday School teacher whom everyone loved and enjoyed being around... except for me. I didn't agree with what he taught, nor did I really agree with how he taught it. And this all just happened to coincide with several events that affected the youth group I went to. I guess the combination of these events led to my rejection of what they were attempting to teach me. I still went to church on Sundays, but it was reluctantly, and with great frustration (and by my senior year of high school, it usually involved a big fight as well). I still went to youth group, and I even became the president of the youth group during my senior year (a grand total of.... 10 people! And that's on a good day), but I didn't enjoy what I was doing.

It probably didn't help that I had a personal crisis during my senior year. See, I've never been a very emotional person. That's not something I like to delve into. I compartmentalize things... tuck them neatly into their little boxes where they're supposed to stay. And in the beginning of my senior year, my entire world was rocked.

My Poppy died during the first week of school my senior year after a long battle with Congestive Heart Failure. For five years, I watched him fight this condition, and it was always one step forward and two steps back with him. And for those five years, I constantly wrestled with one question- how could a God who's supposed to be so merciful cause my Poppy so much pain and suffering? Poppy had never done anything wrong; why was he the one to go through this?

Throughout my senior year, I continued to grapple with this question. And in the meantime, I was forced to confront my own mortality and my own emotions. I'll admit it- I was bitter after Poppy died. I was depressed after Poppy died. Hell, truth be told, I'll still bitter, and to an extent, I'm still depressed. And strong emotions like grief and I don't do well together. We butt heads because grief needs to be fully expressed before one can accept it and go on, and I simply did not want to deal with that. I wanted the grief to get tucked in its little box in the back of my head.

As my senior year went on, I found that I gained no comfort in anything. My parents couldn't comfort me because more often than not, we were at each other's throats. I couldn't bury myself in school work or actual work because eventually, I'd run out of things to do. I couldn't attempt to supress my emotions with running because running can only block out but so much. And I couldn't find comfort in religion because I was constantly questioning it.

Eventually summer came, and my parents couldn't force me to go to church because I was working most Sundays. May led to June, which in turn led to July and August, and eventually I found myself up at college. At Student Org Night, I gravitated towards the Wesley Foundation table out of sheer habit; after all, being raised a Methodist, it was only natural that I checked out the Methodist organization that was on campus. But I never went to any of their events or meetings. And when I was home, I only went to church on holidays, like Good Friday or Easter. Once more, I found myself home for summer, and once again, I was working most Sundays. However, I noticed a new trend- my parents had stopped going to church. This puzzled me. Here were the people who just a year ago had forced me to go to an institution I hated with a passion, and yet they were sleeping in every Sunday morning. I took it with a grain of salt, though. They were adults; they could make their own decisions. Instead, I took to working all the time, occasionally pausing to consider the possibility of religion.

Now, I find myself back up at school again. A week ago, I decided to take a leap and go to the Wesley Foundation's Tuesday evening Bible Study. The next day, I found myself hauling my tired bones out of bed at 06:30 AM to go to 08:00 AM Communion. I was shocked at how I was treated, but in a good way. The members of the Wesley Foundation welcomed me with open arms. They knew I was grappling with the idea of God and Jesus and whatnot, and yet they still welcomed me. And truth be told, I'm still in awe of it. I'm in awe of it, but I'm also thankful.

I'm still wrestling with the idea of religion as I write this post. I'm sure I'll be wrestling with it for a long time after this. After all, I'm the logical person in my family. It's only natural that I attempt to understand something that I truly can't. But for now, I'm Ok with it. See, I think I've found a place where I can voice my opinions and questions without prejudice. I think I've found a group of people that I can talk to and trust. I think that maybe, just maybe, I've found a community.

And for that, I am thankful. Truly, deeply, utterly and completely thankful.

I don't get many things right the first time
In fact, I am told that a lot
Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls
Brought me here

And where was I before the day
That I first saw Your lovely face?
Now I see it everyday
And I know

That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest.
-Ben Folds, "The Luckiest"

Insanity At Its Finest

Main Entry: in·san·i·ty
Pronunciation: \in-ˈsa-nə-tē\
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural in·san·i·ties
Date: 1590

1 : a deranged state of the mind usually occurring as a specific disorder (as schizophrenia)
2 : such unsoundness of mind or lack of understanding as prevents one from having the mental capacity required by law to enter into a particular relationship, status, or transaction or as removes one from criminal or civil responsibility
3 a : extreme folly or unreasonableness b : something utterly foolish or unreasonable
4 : doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results

My friends and I were the definition of insanity earlier tonight. After all, who'll drag two guys and a middle school-aged child down into the kitchen and make brownies? Absolute and complete insanity!

I guess I ought to start from the beginning. This weekend was family weekend at my school, so we had a lot of guests up here. My suitemate's younger sister came up and was staying with her, so we decided that we were going to make brownies. Friday night, we began the preparations, "we" being me, my suitemate Lauren, her roommate, Stephanie, and our friend, Logan. We all piled into Logan's car and drove over to Wal-Mart. Logan bought a Snuggie and a Nerf gun, I bought Apples to Apples and The Chronicles of Riddick, and Lauren bought brownie supplies (including the Perfect Brownie pan- As seen on TV). After running around Wal-Mart and scaring a few fellow customers, we decided it was time to head back to campus. It was only when we got back to our dorm that we realized that we forgot two crucial ingredients for our brownies- oil and eggs. No one wanted to go buy them from the convenience store on campus; after all, they charge an arm and a leg for EVERYTHING! So, we decided to wait until the next day to go get the supplies.

Fast forward 24 hours, and we're back at Wal-Mart again. Lauren's younger sister had arrived earlier in the day, so she'd joined us for our trip. Immediately, she and Logan get to bickering back and forth (in a nice, slightly humorous way). And oh was it funny. Logan got owned by her! I swear, I don't think I've ever laughed so much in my life!

Eventually, we get all of our supplies and make our way back to campus. As I head to go get the kitchen key from the RA on duty, the rest of the group goes to rally the troops and meet me down there. When I get to the kitchen, I find that we've been joined by Lauren's roommate, Stephanie, and Logan's roommate, Spencer. As I walk into the kitchen, Lauren pulls me aside, telling me everyone's in the cabinets. Well, sure enough, Logan's hiding in the tall one that runs from the floor to the ceiling. Spencer's somehow managed to stuff himself into a tiny cabinet under the sink and Stephanie's in another small cabinet across the kitchen. Immediately, I could tell this was going to be interesting.

As we got ready to make the brownies, we realized that we epically failed in the planning department, as we had no bowl to mix the batter in, nor did we have anything to mix it with. Eventually, we got a pot from the RA and I found a spoon and fork in my room that were clean. I ended taking over the measuring duties, Stephanie mixed everything and Lauren's sister watched us like a hawk, waiting for one of us to give her the bowl to lick after we were done with it. Lauren poured the batter into her "Perfect Brownie" pan, and Logan made makeshift oven mits with the box (another oversight of ours) while Spencer stole Stephanie's flipflops and she chased him all around the basement trying to get it back. In the middle of all this, Lauren's sister finally got her wish, and was perched happily on the counter doing nothing other than licking the bowl.

With the brownies now in the oven, we did what any college student would do on a Saturday night- hang out in the study lounge. Mind you, it was completely empty (thank goodness). As we waited, we found our own different ways to entertain ourselves. Logan and Spencer took to ambushing any misfortunate soul who happened to venture down into the study lounge with their soda bottles. When they weren't ambushing people, Spencer continued to steal Stephanie's flip-flops. Lauren, Lauren's sister and I did the Cupid Shuffle (though I did mine in the traditional Midlothian style, much to their confusion). And Logan continued to be tormented by Lauren's sister. In short, it was just another normal Saturday night.

Eventually, we checked the brownies (Logan got burnt while taking them out, and then got burnt again when putting them back in after Lauren and I decided that they weren't done enough). So, we went back to creating chaos in the study lounge again. I've got to be honest- I've never had to much fun in the study lounge before. Logan and Spencer were running around like lunatics, Lauren and I were laughing at them, and in general, it was just a great night.

After a few more minutes, we checked the brownies and decided that they were done. This only added even more chaos, as we were all attempting to get brownies (om nom nom nom nom nom... inside joke, sorry). With our baked-goods craving satisfied, we continued to create chaos in the study lounge. All good things must come to an end, though, and soon enough, we were all tired and ready to go to bed. I know, it's amazing! Who would've thought that college kids could get tired?

But, yeah. That was my Saturday night. It was completely crazy, and truth be told, you probably had to be there in order to realize just how great it was. All I can say is that I've got the best friends here, and this past weekend was probably one of the best weekends I've ever had. :)

25 Things

A while back, these "25 Things" notes were floating around on Facebook, clogging up users feeds with new stories from their friends. Now, I never posted one of these things, but I have written a few of them (I think I really have 100 random things saved somewhere). Anyway, I've decided to post one of my lists here, just for the heck of it. So, here it goes. My 25 things.

1) When I played softball, I rolled down the top of my right sock for good luck
2) This habit of rolling my right sock down eventually led me to win 3 championships in 6 years.
3) If I ever disappear in a store like Wal-Mart or Target, chances are you can find me in the books or TV on DVD section
4) I tend to be really intuitive to the point of knowing when something bad is going to happen before it actually occurs
5) Call it a gut feeling, an ability to read body language, or an extension of this whole intuition thing, but I also tend to know how someone is feeling before I talk to them.
6) I think it'd be really sweet if I could beat-box
7) My sense of humor tends to be very dry and twisted. As a result, I'm often the one laughing at inappropriate moments.
8) I know how to operate a really complex pump system for a pool, but often get confused when doing simple things (like using a microwave)
9) I'm pretty convinced that I suffer from undiagnosed ADD
10) I respect the members of our military with every fiber in my being and wish I was tough enough to do what they do and make the sacrifices they make
11) "She Don't Want The World" by 3 Doors Down makes me want to cry
12) For a year, I couldn't listen to the song "Without You" from RENT because it made me think of my Poppy
13) Sarcasm is my second language
14) And George Carlin is my favorite comedian
15) I am absolutely clueless when it comes to doing math. Seriously, I am
16) I have a horrible habit of picking at my cuticles/nails when I'm nervous or uncomfortable
17) I get really frustrated when people are lazy, incompetent or just plain ignorant.
18) I also have an extremely low bullshit tolerance
19) My dad and I are similar in more ways than I'd like to admit, but it's Ok. We have a lot of interesting conversations (mostly about politics)
20) Speaking of my dad, I've learned more from him that I have from all of my teachers/professors combined. I don't know what I'd do without him
21) I am a libertarian and believe that our government needs to undergo a complete overhaul and return to the original ways of the constitution
22) I have little sympathy for people who refuse to get up off their asses and work for what they want, and then complain about everything
23) If a good song is playing on the radio while I'm in the car, chances are I'll start dancing. And I'm not a good dancer.
24) My favorite TV shows are NCIS, Bones, Fringe and Heroes
25) I'm a sucker for the guy next door. I'm also a sucker for a man in uniform, and a guy with pretty eyes.

Are You Ready For Some Football?

Break out the facepaint (or warpaint, whatever you want to call it), jersey's and fire up that grill. Football season is back!

Now, football's never been really big at my school. We've got a small team in a small division. We're not one of those teams you're going to see on ESPN or Fox (unless we make the playoffs like we did last year). My cousins and friends are jealous because instead of praying that I win a lottery to get a ticket, I just have to show my student ID and walk through the gate. In fact, I think most people are a little surprised that we even have a football team.

I support my football team, and I always will. However, my loyalty also lies with a couple of other teams. If our football game is an away game, then you'll probably find me sitting in front of the TV, yelling at my beloved Hokies (or Chokies, as they're affectionately known in my household). On Sunday's, you might find me watching some NFL. I tend to avoid watching them, though. There's just something about watching the NFL that I don't like. I can't really put my finger on it. Let's just say that I live for college football, and that sentiment is shared by my father.

It's amusing, actually. Dad usually has three football buddies (four, when I'm home). On any given Saturday, you can probably find him lying on the couch with Cleo (my cat) sitting above his head, and Kodi and Callie (our dogs) lying at his feet as they settle in to watch his alma mater play. By the second quarter, all four of them will probably have fallen asleep. It's Ok, though. They'll wake up in the middle of the third and watch until the end.

If there's a major game that's going to be played later in the evening, then sometimes dad cooks chili. He and I (and sometimes my brother) will go out and get all the neccessary ingredients earlier in the day, and when we return home, we begin the process of "building" the chili. Dad has a sworn by recipe that's never been written down and depends on constantly changing proportions of spices, meat and tomato products. Each pot of chili is a little different, so we've got to be flexible. While one batch might need more cayenne pepper, another might need more salt. Or maybe we need more tomato paste in one while another needs more water. Either way, we're constantly testing the chili as it cooks, making adjustments as need. By about 02:00 PM, we've usually got a rather large pot of chili simmering on the stove. About fifteen minutes before kickoff, we'll all gather around and dip out our bowls of the thick stew. This is where things get interesting.

Each member of my family has their own unique way of fixing their chili. Personally, I prefer to put a fair amount of shredded sharp cheese in mine, with a small dollop of sour cream. Dad tends to steer away from any cheese or sour cream, instead pulling out the Fritos Scoops that serve as his preferred method of consumption. My brother will also use the Fritos, but he usually throws some cheese in his chili as well. Mom's never been a huge fan of chili, but she'll eat it when Dad takes the time to cook it. She usually throws sour cream in hers, but no cheese.

One pot of chili usually produces enough thick, red stew for all four of us to go back for seconds (and sometimes thirds). In fact, usually we've got enough left over for us all to have at least a couple of bowls later in the week.

Chili is my family's big football tradition. It brings us all together in one way or another, even if during the beginning of the day, we'd been all doing our own things. In my humble opinion, I don't think there's anything better than coming into the house after running errands while home from college and smelling that distinct chili smell. At the end of the football season, I may not remember the final scores of all the huge games, or who even played the Super Bowl. I can bet you money, though, that I can remember those days where Dad and I stood around the stove, discussing what exactly was missing from the pot.

Once again, though, I am faced with the reality that my chili days are numbered. I'm away at college, and to be honest, chili doesn't exactly ship well through the USPS. So, I cherish those moments I have with my dad, cooking that chili. I cherish those nights spent sitting around the TV, yelling at the players and coaches as spoons (and Fritos) scrape the bottoms of bowls. I cherish that time I get to spend with my family, because I know that those moments are slowly beginning to dwindle in number.

So, whether your family's football tradition is wearing jerseys and face/warpaint or watching the game with friends in your team-themed room, remember this- these are the important moments. These are the moments that you'll remember for a lifetime. These are the moments.

With that said, I've got one last question for ya...

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL?!?!?!?!

2010- Bring it!

And... it's official. At 03:05 PM today, my '09 pool season ended. No longer will I be spending days upon days maintaining and managing a pool. Instead, I get to go to classes... YIPPEE!! (yeah, right)

Though there were many trying moments this year, I've got to admit it- I think this was the best season I've had in my 3 years as a lifeguard. The people were great, the days weren't hugely stressful (most of the time) and, seeing as we had only 2 rescues (which were really just assists), I'd say we had a really successful season. Sure, in retrospect, I can pick out several moments that I'd like to do over... things I could've done better, but hey. Live and learn. I'll do better next year.

In so many ways, I learned so much this season. Not only did I learn about pool chemistry (anyone need their water tested??) and more about pool maintenance (how about diving boards? I could probably fix your diving board...), but I also gained better people and time management skills. My patience was tested several times, so I most certainly gained more of that virtue. And I think one of the biggest things I learned was to let go.

When I was first hired, my safety coordinator told me something I didn't even know about myself. Apparently I'm one of those people who believes in the saying "if you want something done and you want it done right, do it yourself." Looking back, I can definitely see where he'd say that. Anyway, when I was hired, he pointed that out and then told me he wanted me to stop that. I was a manager, and it while I did have more responsibilities and had to pull my weight, he didn't want me doing that. And so, over the course of the summer, I attempted to back off and let my guards do it... things like testing the water, cleaning the bathrooms, etc, etc. Sure, I did slip up a few times (but the tiles were never going to get scrubbed if I didn't do it!), but over all, I think I did and Ok job.

With that said, I think it's pretty clear in my mind that I'm optimistic for the 2010 pool season. True, I'm not sure if I'm going to return to my pool from this year. I've been at it for two years; it's probably time for a change of scenery. But, I think things will go well next season, and I've got faith in my supervisors. They'll put me where I need to be.

So, farewell, '09 Pool Season. You were fun (at times) and made life interesting.

To 2010: Bring it! I'm ready for you! :)

Invasion!

"Ohmygod, what is that?"

"Ewwwww.... gross! I thought I got away from those!"

"It looks like a centipede! ... Do you mind if I kill it?"

"By all means, kill it. I don't care."

Such was the conversation one of my suitmates and I held at 08:45 this morning, after she made an all too gross discovery. Apparently, our dorm has become a home to house centipedes... nasty little creatures with way too many legs and a creepy-crawly walk. The strange thing about it is, despite the fact that yes, we do have a lot of stuff in a small area, we're actually very clean. It's not like any of us live in pig sties or something like that.

As my suitmate danced around in the area right in front of the bathroom, I couldn't help but to be slightly amused once more. We used to get those all the time at the pool, and I kid you not, I did the exact same thing, only on a guard stand. It usually started with Jimmy putting umbrella's up behind me, the bug falling on my stand and me screaming the ever typical comment.

"Ohmygod, gross!!! Jimmy, kill it!!"

Thus, Jimmy would walk over, laugh at my hysterical reaction to the small creature and proceed to flick it off the stand. Unfortunately, Jimmy was over 200 miles away from this creature, so he couldn't flick it away for my suitemate and I. Instead, my suitemate put on a brave face, grabbed a flip-flop and proceeded to crush the creature with it.

I think my suitemate said it best as we looked at the now dead but still gross creature post-mortem.

"I swear to God, if one of those things crawls on me when I'm sleeping, I'm going to scream fucking bloody murder."

Me too, Chica. Me too.

Did They Have These Problems????

Even though I'm back to school it seems like I can't get away from the pool. This time, though, my inability to leave it isn't work-related. Instead, it deals with where my class is located.

James Madison University was originally founded as an all-women college called The State Normal and Industrial School for Women in 1908. It was a small campus located in the Shenandoah Valley, tiny compared to what it is now. There were only roughly 13 buildings, all of which are still in use today (though all with renovations, while still keeping their original charm). Wilson Hall is the centerpiece of what is known today as The Quad, and if you look at it from there, you'll see Keezell Hall branching off to the right, and Maury Hall to the right. The hall we'll be focusing on today is Keezell.

Back when it first opened, Keezell Hall was the gym, complete with a large pool in the ground floor. Today, the gym is known as UREC, is located across campus (and across the interstate), and yes, it does have a pool. Keezell Hall has been renovated, and now serves as the home of the English and Foreign Language departments. My American Literature Post 1865 class is located in what was originally the well of the pool.

Upon hearing this, I was a little surprised; I'd never known there was a gym here before. However, upon surveying the room once more, it became all too evident to me that indeed this had been a swimming pool. Thus, I resigned myself to "another five months at the pool." As the teacher began her lecture, though, I found my thoughts drifting into a rather interesting direction... a direction I know all to well... a lifeguarding direction. I began thinking about pool chemistry, chlorine and pH. How did they regulate that back then? Did they have chlorine pumps like we have now? If so, how did they work?

While thinking about all of this, I couldn't help but to remember all the chlorine mishaps at Foxcroft. Did the pool here have the same problems as us? Or, maybe I should consider elaborating on what exactly a chlorine mishap is...

Commence Lifeguarding Flashback

It was a June morning when one of my guards, Melissa, and I were cleaning the hairstrainer. Everything had been going well- the pool was clean, the pressure wasn't too high and pool chemistry was perfect. Remaining optimistic, I put the basket in the hairstrainer, primed it, shut it and turned it on as Melissa walked out of the pump room. All of a sudden, a clear liquid starts shooting out of our return valve, and catches Melissa on her leg. She yelps, I yelp and we turn the pump off. Thus, I get the job of calling my supervisor and telling her what's going on.

Me: Hey, we've got a problem over here.
Supervisor: What's going on?
Me: Well, our return valve is shooting clear liquid at us everytime we turn the system on. It wasn't doing this until after we cleaned the hairstrainer.

My supervisor assures me that she'll be at the pool ASAP; leave the system off and run things as normal. Twenty minutes later, she shows up, and I show her what's going on. As soon as I turn off the pump, she gives me a look.

Supervisor: You don't smell that?
Me: Smell what?
Supervisor: That's chlorine spraying out of the tube.

As a lifeguard (and a history major with an interest in WWI) I'm well aware of the dangers of chlorine. It can give you a headache in small doses, knock you out with a large whiff, burn the lining of the lungs and your skin, and yes, it can kill you. All things considered, though, it's not nearly as dangerous as another chemical we have at the pool, muriatic acid, better known as hydrochloric acid (but that's another story for another day).

Immediately, the supervisor set to fixing out problem- the cracked feed tube. I left, and went through rotation. As I was sitting at the gate, my supervisor let me know she got the problem fixed. She leaves, and we continued running the pool. All day, though, we keep smelling chlorine near the pump room. Even I'm smelling it, and that's saying something. Finally, with a shirt over my nose, I go into the pump room and am astonished at what I see.

Chlorine bubbling from the same tube that was fixed earlier, just in a different spot. Sighing, I got and get my cellphone, once again calling my supervisor and letting her know what's up. She comes out and patches it with an all-mighty tool- duct tape. The seal holds (and has held since that day), and we leave at 8 when the pool closes.

Fast Forward 2 Months

I was running off of fumes when I unlocked the gate to the pool on a Friday morning, after attending a manager meeting at the other end of the county. The first thing I'm greeted with as I unlocked the snack shack was a large puddle of chocolate on the floor with ants all over it.

Me: Great. Shit.

Now, not only did I have to open the pool but I had to solve this mystery too. Somedays I hated my job.

Melissa came in, and we opened the pool, with both of us noticing a strong smell of chlorine again. This was weird. I checked all the barrels, the tube and the feed, and nothing was leaking. I decided it was from where I'd refilled the baby pool chlorinator with skimmer sticks earlier.

Two hours later, I finally discovered the source of the chocolate mystery. Our freezer hadn't been shut the entire way, and had slowly defrosted during the night, leaving all ice cream sandwiches to melt. Lovely. I got to clean it all up and move everything to the other freezer. As I was cleaning, I still noticed this chlorine smell. Once again, I checked the tubing, and found nothing wrong. Certainly I wasn't going insane- other lifeguards had mentioned it too. So, why couldn't I find the problem?

6 o'clock rolls around, and I happened to meander into the pump room to look for something. The overwhelming smell of chlorine hits me, and I look down to see the tubing that feeds into the return valve bubbling. Well, good to know that problem's solved. Now, how the hell do we fix it? We'd already cut the tubing once before when it decided to spew chlorine every where.

In the end, our other supervisor had to come fix it. It was patched quickly, though, and everything was Ok.

End Lifeguarding Flashback

So, now I find myself in yet another pool, albeit an emptied and renovated one for academic instead of professional reasons. It's a new place, and eventually, I'll get used to it (and the lack of windows). I don't like the room, and I don't really like the class. Despite it all, I know one thing. At least I won't have to worry about leaking chlorine tubes. :)

Politcal Heatwave

Thunderstorms have been rolling across the nation recently, and I'm not talking about the weather. It seems that like the temperatures down here in the South, the heat around politics has been rising, and not for the better. With all the debating that's been going on, it seems like now's yet another point in time where it's important to know where you stand in regards to your beliefs. With that thought in mind, I'm going to attempt to do so... to state my political beliefs on a a few topics that I personally think are important (in no particular order).

Universal Health Care
No. No no no no no. My parents work hard, and they deserve the benefits that their companies offer them. They don't take advantage of them, and in my opinion, considering how long they've both been with their respective employers, they deserve their health care benefits. And I plan to work hard and also get a job that offers benefits as well. Why should I have to lower my health care standards for someone else who's unwilling to work and earn health care benefits? Even more, why should the average citizens like my family and I be forced to give up our health care for something substandard while all the government officials get to keep theirs? That's not right, and we all know that. Listen to the people- we don't want this. Don't you government officials dare force us into something that we've spoken out against. And don't you dare attempt to make a hasty decision in regards to this.

Illegal Immigration
How can we afford to offer all these corporate bailouts and stimulus checks but not afford to build a fence across our southern border and keep it maintained and patrolled? Stop the amnesties. Send the illegal immigrants back to wherever they came from. I'm not being racist- when they obtain the proper documents, can effectively communicate in English and actually legally cross the borders, then we can let them stay. Until then, though, they need to stay in their own countries, and we need to keep them there. Close the borders, fill in all the holes. With our economic state right now, we cannot afford to have them here.

Education
Federal government: butt out. Let the states decide how they want to run their education systems. And stop blackmailing the state education systems with this No Child Left Behind bullshit. From what I've seen, it's not really helping anyone. If anything, it's probably hindering more schools. Federal funding for test scores? What the hell kind of system is that? There've already been cases of school districts sending in fraudulent test scores- do you really think that's going to stop? No. It's not. So get your greasy paws off the education systems.

Redistribution of Wealth
Get rid of it. Right now. Personally, this is a crime in and of itself, and I call it stealing. I work hard for my money. I went out and found a steady job. Why should I have to give up my hard-earned cash to some Joe Schmoe who's unwilling to get up off his butt and get a job? You didn't work for this cash, therefore you don't deserve it. Want your share? Get a job. Then we can talk.

US Troops in Iraq
Don't get me wrong- I'm all for bringing our boys home. I've got plenty of family and friends in the military, and I'd hate to see any of them get killed. The fact of the matter is we helped instigate this current situation in Iraq. Therefore, we should help resolve it. It's our responsibility. We cannot leave that country hanging. If anything, that'll make even more nations dislike us. We've got enough enemies out there as it is. We don't need anymore.

Corporate Bailouts
Stop them. Why are you giving money to the companies that put us in our current economic problems? They don't deserve the bail outs. Why don't you focus on putting that money to better uses, like paying off the huge deficit that we have instead of creating even more of one?

Those are just some brief beliefs and observations that I've come up with. Those are my opinions. While they probably aren't thought out as well as they could be, they're better than some beliefs I've heard. Please don't bash or flame them.

I really do urge everyone to sit down and think for a little bit. Figure out your political beliefs. Perhaps it could help cool this political heat wave down some.

The Letter

Here's another interesting article I was sent by my uncle just earlier this week. It's just some food for thought. Enjoy!

GLENN: I got a letter from a woman in Arizona. She writes an open letter to our nation's leadership: I'm a home grown American citizen, 53, registered Democrat all my life. Before the last presidential election I registered as a Republican because I no longer felt the Democratic Party represents my views or works to pursue issues important to me. Now I no longer feel the Republican Party represents my views or works to pursue issues important to me. The fact is I no longer feel any political party or representative in Washington represents my views or works to pursue the issues important to me. There must be someone. Please tell me who you are. Please stand up and tell me that you are there and that you're willing to fight for our Constitution as it was written. Please stand up now. You might ask yourself what my views and issues are that I would horribly feel so disenfranchised by both major political parties. What kind of nut job am I? Will you please tell me?

Well, these are briefly my views and issues for which I seek representation:

One, illegal immigration. I want you to stop coddling illegal immigrants and secure our borders. Close the underground tunnels. Stop the violence and the trafficking in drugs and people. No amnesty, not again. Been there, done that, no resolution. P.S., I'm not a racist. This isn't to be confused with legal immigration.

Two, the TARP bill, I want it repealed and I want no further funding supplied to it. We told you no, but you did it anyway. I want the remaining unfunded 95% repealed. Freeze, repeal.

Three: Czars, I want the circumvention of our checks and balances stopped immediately. Fire the czars. No more czars. Government officials answer to the process, not to the president. Stop trampling on our Constitution and honor it.

Four, cap and trade. The debate on global warming is not over. There is more to say.

Five, universal healthcare. I will not be rushed into another expensive decision. Don't you dare try to pass this in the middle of the night and then go on break. Slow down!

Six, growing government control. I want states rights and sovereignty fully restored. I want less government in my life, not more. Shrink it down. Mind your own business. You have enough to take care of with your real obligations. Why don't you start there.

Seven, ACORN. I do not want ACORN and its affiliates in charge of our 2010 census. I want them investigated. I also do not want mandatory escrow fees contributed to them every time on every real estate deal that closes. Stop the funding to ACORN and its affiliates pending impartial audits and investigations. I do not trust them with taking the census over with our taxpayer money. I don't trust them with our taxpayer money. Face up to the allegations against them and get it resolved before taxpayers get any more involved with them. If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, hello. Stop protecting your political buddies. You work for us, the people. Investigate.

Eight, redistribution of wealth. No, no, no. I work for my money. It is mine. I have always worked for people with more money than I have because they gave me jobs. That is the only redistribution of wealth that I will support. I never got a job from a poor person. Why do you want me to hate my employers? Why ‑‑ what do you have against shareholders making a profit?

Nine, charitable contributions. Although I never got a job from a poor person, I have helped many in need. Charity belongs in our local communities, where we know our needs best and can use our local talent and our local resources. Butt out, please. We want to do it ourselves.

Ten, corporate bailouts. Knock it off. Sink or swim like the rest of us. If there are hard times ahead, we'll be better off just getting into it and letting the strong survive. Quick and painful. Have you ever ripped off a Band‑Aid? We will pull together. Great things happen in America under great hardship. Give us the chance to innovate. We cannot disappoint you more than you have disappointed us.

Eleven, transparency and accountability. How about it? No, really, how about it? Let's have it. Let's say we give the buzzwords a rest and have some straight honest talk. Please try ‑‑ please stop manipulating and trying to appease me with clever wording. I am not the idiot you obviously take me for. Stop sneaking around and meeting in back rooms making deals with your friends. It will only be a prelude to your criminal investigation. Stop hiding things from me.

Twelve, unprecedented quick spending. Stop it now.

Take a breath. Listen to the people. Let's just slow down and get some input from some nonpoliticians on the subject. Stop making everything an emergency. Stop speed reading our bills into law. I am not an activist. I am not a community organizer. Nor am I a terrorist, a militant or a violent person. I am a parent and a grandparent. I work. I'm busy. I'm busy. I am busy, and I am tired. I thought we elected competent people to take care of the business of government so that we could work, raise our families, pay our bills, have a little recreation, complain about taxes, endure our hardships, pursue our personal goals, cut our lawn, wash our cars on the weekends and be responsible contributing members of society and teach our children to be the same all while living in the home of the free and land of the brave.

I entrusted you with upholding the Constitution. I believed in the checks and balances to keep from getting far off course. What happened? You are very far off course. Do you really think I find humor in the hiring of a speed reader to unintelligently ramble all through a bill that you signed into law without knowing what it contained? I do not. It is a mockery of the responsibility I have entrusted to you. It is a slap in the face. I am not laughing at your arrogance. Why is it that I feel as if you would not trust me to make a single decision about my own life and how I would live it but you should expect that I should trust you with the debt that you have laid on all of us and our children. We did not want the TARP bill. We said no. We would repeal it if we could. I am sure that we still cannot. There is such urgency and recklessness in all of the recent spending.

From my perspective, it seems that all of you have gone insane. I also know that I am far from alone in these feelings. Do you honestly feel that your current pursuits have merit to patriotic Americans? We want it to stop. We want to put the brakes on everything that is being rushed by us and forced upon us. We want our voice back. You have forced us to put our lives on hold to straighten out the mess that you are making. We will have to give up our vacations, our time spent with our children, any relaxation time we may have had and money we cannot afford to spend on you to bring our concerns to Washington. Our president often knows all the right buzzword is unsustainable. Well, no kidding. How many tens of thousands of dollars did the focus group cost to come up with that word? We don't want your overpriced words. Stop treating us like we're morons.

We want all of you to stop focusing on your reelection and do the job we want done, not the job you want done or the job your party wants done. You work for us and at this rate I guarantee you not for long because we are coming. We will be heard and we will be represented. You think we're so busy with our lives that we will never come for you? We are the formerly silent majority, all of us who quietly work , pay taxes, obey the law, vote, save money, keep our noses to the grindstone and we are now looking up at you. You have awakened us, the patriotic spirit so strong and so powerful that it had been sleeping too long. You have pushed us too far. Our numbers are great. They may surprise you. For every one of us who will be there, there will be hundreds more that could not come. Unlike you, we have their trust. We will represent them honestly, rest assured. They will be at the polls on voting day to usher you out of office. We have cancelled vacations. We will use our last few dollars saved. We will find the representation among us and a grassroots campaign will flourish. We didn't ask for this fight. But the gloves are coming off. We do not come in violence, but we are angry. You will represent us or you will be replaced with someone who will. There are candidates among us when hewill rise like a Phoenix from the ashes that you have made of our constitution.

Democrat, Republican, independent, libertarian. Understand this. We don't care. Political parties are meaningless to us. Patriotic Americans are willing to do right by us and our Constitution and that is all that matters to us now. We are going to fire all of you who abuse power and seek more. It is not your power. It is ours and we want it back. We entrusted you with it and you abused it. You are dishonorable. You are dishonest. As Americans we are ashamed of you. You have brought shame to us. If you are not representing the wants and needs of your constituency loudly and consistently, in spite of the objections of your party, you will be fired. Did you hear? We no longer care about your political parties. You need to be loyal to us, not to them. Because we will get you fired and they will not save you. If you do or can represent me, my issues, my views, please stand up. Make your identity known. You need to make some noise about it. Speak up. I need to know who you are. If you do not speak up, you will be herded out with the rest of the sheep and we will replace the whole damn congress if need be one by one. We are coming. Are we coming for you? Who do you represent? What do you represent? Listen. Because we are coming. We the people are coming.

Source: The Letter

The Season Thus Far

"A good lifeguard will mostly stay dry, if using prevention." -Ann Lawton

Though it's only been roughly two weeks, it seems like I've easily slipped back into the role of the lifeguard. I've got the stereotypical tan working (sunglasses tan included) and am most likely smelling like chlorine and sunscreen 24/7 now. Indeed, it seems that summer has begun.

Like I said before, I had a lot of high hopes for this summer, and so far, it appears that many of those hopes can be fulfilled. We've got a good group of guards (for the most part) and as of now, it seems like our relations with the pool committee are holding strong. Sure, we've had our fair share of petty troubles (none of which I'll divulge here), but nothing too major had occurred... knock on wood. In fact, I'd even reckon to say that our pool's looking really good compared to some others out there.

Now, mind you, in returning to the world of lifeguarding, I've slipped into some peculiar habits. For example, instead of being upset when it thunders or rains, I jump up and down for joy. Chemical names, first aid terms, and rather strange jargon (such as the term "pushing") have all become regular vocabulary for me. I have a cynical outlook on life once more, find dry, dark humor in almost every situation, work in an environment that's full of unintentional sexual innuendos, and more often than not, I question the intelligence of some of the people around me. It's Ok, though. This is the type of environment I'm used to. In fact, I think I'd rather be a lifeguard than have any other job.

As the season progresses, I continue to have high hopes. Perhaps this will be the best pool season thus far.

Time will tell.

Indeed, Summer is Here

Lifeguards roasting on an open stand
Sunburn nipping at your nose
Summertime songs being sung by a pump
And folks not dressed up like Eskimos

Everybody knows a Popsicle and some slushies
Help to make the season cool
Tiny tots with their eyes all aglow,
Will find it hard to swim today.

They know the pool opens today;
With diving boards and swimming lanes there for their play.
And every single guard is going to stress,
When they learn they need to give another swim test.

And so I'm offering this simple phrase,
To kids from one to ninety-two,
Although its been said many times, many ways,
Happy Summer to you.

Yes, I took the lyrics to "The Christmas Song" and turned them into a lifeguard song. Blame Zach. He gave me the idea when he was singing "All I want for Christmas is my Own CPR Dummy." Oh the things we'll do when we get bored.

Technically speaking, pool season hasn't officially started yet, and I'm already epically sunburnt. A good sign for the season? I think not.

Despite the seemingly ill omens,I'm rather excited for this summer. From what I can tell, we've got a good set of guards, and I'm ready to see what they can do. I won't lie though- I'm also a little nervous. Then again, I think everyone's a bit nervous at the beginning of the summer. I think things will go well, though.

You know you’re a lifeguard when:
-You are on vacation and at the hotel pool you can’t stop yourself from yelling ‘’ WALK PLEASE’’ to all the uncontrollable kids.
-Even if you haven’t been in the pool for a week, as soon as you sweat, get into the shower, get sprayed, go out in the rain (get wet in anyway) you smell of chlorine.
-All the kids in the pool all become "buddy" or "sweetie".
-You roll your eyes when watching BAYWATCH and feel the urge to explain what the lifeguards are doing wrong to the person next to you. Regardless if they want to hear it or not.
-Pushing people in the pool stops getting funny…seriously… it sucks getting wet and someone could get hurt.
-When’s someone’s hurt, you have the urge to run with your arms stretched out yelling "IT’S OKAY I’M A LIFEGUARD"!
-You roll your eyes when someone gets tapped on the back when chocking.
-It’s weird to see your co-workers in clothes or make-up.
-When someone’s doing CPR in the movies and the victim coughs out the water and breaths, you laugh.
-"save a whistle, blow a lifeguard" is the funniest and most creative pick-up line you’ve ever heard. Ever.
-You forget how loud your voice is.
-Putting a towel around your bathing suit makes it okay for you to walk out in public.
-PA carries, spinal turnovers and removals are suitable party conversations/debates.
-Your hair dresser is starting a petition for you to stop ruining your hair.
-You get upset when someone who’s not a lifeguard has a lifeguard sweatshirt, t-shirt or sweatpants.
-Patrons are not recognizable when clothed.
-You can fix/tighten any goggles without interrupting your scan.
-"Between the nipples" isn’t as dirty as it sounds.
-When the clock is your best friend and your worst enemy.
-You have two minutes left before you go on deck, that’s enough for some food, bathroom break and to finish your magazine article.
-You tell children that run past you in a store to "WALK!"
-You see danger everywhere.
-You know 10 different games to play with a whistle.
-You smell like chlorine, even on your day off.
-30 and 2 means something to you.
-You carry goggles in your car.
-You’ve spent more than $20 on a pair of goggles.
-You require new bathing suits every 3 months.
-All of your suits have the word "guard" on them.
-Men in Speedos don't faze you.(Even old men.)
-A 10 foot pool doesn't seem very deep.
-You dream about people drowning then wake up and think "I performed that rescue wrong!"
-Every time you heard a whistle you jump up and are ready to run.
-Not only do you know how to make mustard gas, but you know exactly where to find the supplies
-You feel the urge to yell "walk" to kids who run....on the playground
-You watch people do CPR on Grey's Anatomy and yell "YOURE DOING IT WRONG!" only to find that no one in the room really cares
-No matter where you are or what time of year it is, you get REALLY excited when you hear thunder
-You feel the urge to tell the lifeguards at pools you swim at that YOU'RE a lifeguard, too...just so they know
-You start most of your sentences with "The other day I was guarding and..."
-You either think playing with muriatic acid is fun, or you've inhaled it on accident and are terrified of it
-You get all your summer reading done by mid-June
-When you go to the pool with your friends, you wanna play sharks-and-minnows, marco polo, and star, because damnit, you watch people do it all day and don't get to join in!
-You get pissed when you see shirts that say "Lifeguard" for sale in Abercrombie
-You get really pissed when the garbage bag falls down in the trash can at home and your dad puts trash in it anyway
-You don't think it's weird to go to work barefoot
-At any point during the summer, you can look in your car and find at least 2 empty water bottles, a semi-wet towel, and suntan lotion
-You wave to the neighborhoods that have pools you've worked at when you drive by.
-you don't put your mouth on the end of the pool noodles that have a hole in them (it's like making out with 500 strangers...)
-being 50% naked at work is normal and not promiscuous
-you naturally smell like chlorine
-you refer to coworkers as "pool people"
-you're disgusted when people who aren't lifeguards wear lifeguard attire (some of them can't even swim!)
-you have to leave a note with your food saying that if someone touches it you will kill them, or it's fair game
-Whoever invented kickboards and noodle floats and gave them to kids had no idea of the repercussions it would have on lifeguards for all of history.
-If you've said it once, you've said it twice: NO F-ING RUNNING!
-Why can't those kids see that there's someone lap swimming in the same lane as their throw-the-ball-at-your-friend's-face game?
-Swim meets. Who raised these kids?
-DON'T MESS WITH ROTATION.
-Whistle spinning is a perfectly acceptable way to whiddle away the hours... unless you work for DA. Then it's a good way to get in trouble.
-Thunderstorms are a gift from above.
-Your sunglasses tan is out of control...as well as the x and o on your back (and don't forget your flipflop tan!).
-Putting up another stand/converting the pool is considered punishment.
-Why can't the 2 kids STILL in the pool see the torrential downpour that is coming down upon your head because they refuse to remove themselves?
-Sometimes, one can't help but judge the lap swimmers' swimming abilities.
-How seriously people take you is equally proportionate to how loud you can blow your whistle.
-You've made mental bets over whether or not that 400 pound lady will break the diving board.
-Watching the teenage boys do tricks off the diving board is your only period of entertainment during the day.
-After a few weeks, it seems like there's no need to put on sunscreen because you know you're too dark to develop a burn.
-Sometimes, there are days when you would pay someone to vomit/have diarrhea in the pool.
-You've tried every kind of shampoo you can find--and still, nothing gets the chlorine out.
-Your boyfriend/girlfriend frequently remarks on how strongly you smell of chlorine.
-F you, Marco Polo...F YOU.
-No, I will not judge your cannonball/diving/biggest splash contest.
-You probably shouldn't expect any swimming technique tips either.
-Rec programs/summer camps are the few hours every day when the devil decides to let his child slaves free.
-Deep end tests.
-Why are the retarded parents always the ones with the wild children?
-The "nose game" is a legitimate means of deciding who will go to the deep end first, who has to clean up vomit in the pool, who has to perform the save, etc...
-We open (and close!) the same time we opened/closed yesterday, and the day before, and ALL F-ING SUMMER, don't ask again!
-The number of times you ask how much longer break is equals how many more minutes we add to break time.
-Apparently, the best time to come to the pool is the last 15 minutes we use to close it down.
-In the pool or out of it? Make up your mind!
-You could have just stayed at home and run through the sprinkler if you wanted to know what it was like to wear clothes in the water.
-You've been lifeguarding so long that you tell kids in walmart to walk.
-You laugh at those "No Lifeguard On Duty" signs at hotel pools, because let’s face it, if you're there, you watch all the kids.
-You perpetuate and embrace standard pool myths.
-I don't swim in your bed, so don't have sex in my pool

Dear Mr. President...

Here's a letter in an email I received recently. Being a Republican on a college campus (that is, unfortunately, overwhelmingly Democratic) it's always nice to see something like this. Mind you, this is not my writing. I am merely posting this as food for thought.

Enjoy.

Mr. Obama:
I have had it with you and your administration, sir. Your conduct on your recent trip overseas has convinced me that you are not an adequate representative of the United States of America collectively or of me personally.

You are so obsessed with appeasing the Europeans and the Muslim world that you have abdicated the responsibilities of the President of the United States of America. You are responsible to the citizens of the United States. You are not responsible to the peoples of any other country on earth.

I personally resent that you go around the world apologizing for the United States telling Europeans that we are arrogant and do not care about their status in the world. Sir, what do you think the First World War and the Second World War were all about if not the consideration of the peoples of Europe? Are you brain dead? What do you think the Marshall Plan was all about? Do you not understand or know the history of the 20th century?

Where do you get off telling a Muslim country that the United States does not consider itself a Christian country? Have you not read the Declaration of Independence or the Constitution of the United States? This country was founded on Judeo-Christian ethics and the principles governing this country, at least until you came along, come directly from this heritage. Do you not understand this?

Your bowing to the king of Saudi Arabia is an affront to all Americans. Our President does not bow down to anyone, let alone the king of Saudi Arabia. You don’t show Great Britain, our best and one of our oldest allies, the respect they deserve yet you bow down to the king of Saudi Arabia. How dare you, sir! How dare you!

You can’t find the time to visit the graves of our greatest generation because you don’t want to offend the Germans but make time to visit a mosque in Turkey. You offended our dead and every veteran when you give the Germans more respect than the people who saved the German people from themselves. What’s the matter with you?

I am convinced that you and the members of your administration have the historical and intellectual depth of a mud puddle and should be ashamed of yourselves, all of you.

You are so self-righteously offended by the big bankers and the American automobile manufacturers yet do nothing about the real thieves in this situation, Mr. Dodd, Mr. Frank, Franklin Raines, Jamie Gorelic, the Fannie Mae bonuses, and the Freddie Mac bonuses. What do you intend to do about them? Anything? I seriously doubt it.

What about the U.S. House members passing out $9.1 million in bonuses to their staff members on top of the $2.5 million in automatic pay raises that lawmakers gave themselves? I understand the average House aide got a 17% bonus. I took a 5% cut in my pay to save jobs with my employer. You haven’t said anything about that. Who authorized that? I surely didn’t!

Executives at Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac will be receiving $210 million in bonuses over an eighteen-month period, that's $45 million more than the AIG bonuses. In fact, Fannie and Freddie executives have already been awarded $51 million not a bad take. Who authorized that and why haven’t you expressed your outrage at this group who are largely responsible for the economic mess we have right now.

I resent that you take me and my fellow citizens as brain-dead and not caring about what you idiots do. We are watching what you are doing and we are getting increasingly fed up with all of you. I also want you to know that I personally find just about everything you do and say to be offensive to every one of my sensibilities. I promise you that I will work tirelessly to see that you do not get a chance to spend two terms destroying my beautiful country.

Sincerely,
Every real American

Face it, I Never Actually Learned this Stuff

I read an interesting article in The Breeze earlier today. It was talking about finals, and student's reactions to them. There was one part in it that actually made me laugh out loud, a dangerous feat to attempt while sitting in a dorm that is currently under "23 hour Quiet Hours."

Part of the article's argument was that the only reason professors give finals is to torture their students for one last week before they get let loose for the summer. It included something about them being jealous of the student's youth and vigor (after all, who wouldn't be jealous of someone who can party the entire night, and then still show up to class hungover with their paper written... please note the sarcasm there). While I do partially buy into the torturing the students argument, I really do believe that finals have some importance. Mind you, I'm writing this when I technically should be studying for the 8 AM history final I have tomorrow morning, but that's another story.

All too often it seems that students who get to go to college begin to feel entitled to a good grade. They feel that just because they show up for class and are barely attentive they deserve a passing grade for the course. However, I feel that finals are a good way of separating those who care about their grade from those who don't, though I'd believe that task can get a little difficult during the one week every kid wants to just go home. Like several of my professors said, the final can be used to bump you [the student] up that one letter grade that you need. It can be the ultimate deciding factor over whether you get D or a C, an A or a B.

So, while you're sitting there, cursing all your professors under your breath as you cram for that Chemistry final, remember that while they seem stupid at the moment, these mind-raping, soul-killing, hope-withering tests are actually useful. Maybe it'll give you the extra oomph to study more to get that A you know you can earn.

For the Last Time: I'm not Interested!!

They call your phone at random hours, often multiple times a week, or worse, a day. Their numbers are often disconnected when you call back. And, they never leave a message.

These are the telemarketers.

I'm sure we've all received calls from them, and I'd be willing to bet that the general American population shares a rather mutual disliking of them. After all, who wouldn't dislike a person who spams your phone with unnecessary calls that usually end up causing more trouble than they're worth?

So, what exactly is telemarketing? Typically, it's seen as a method of commercial selling that is conducted over the phone rather than face-to-face with the salesperson calling the consumer. Recently, though, the term "telemarketer" has been expanded to also include phone scams. These phone scams are perhaps even more annoying and most certainly more dangerous than regular telemarketers.

Phone scams are usually target the poor or the elderly. They'll make some claim, like the person has won some money or something similar, and say that they need to pay a fee before they can receive their prize money. Sound suspicious? You betcha. The sad thing is, thousands of people fall victim to scams like this, ultimately getting themselves placed on a sucker list. The person will then be flooded with emails, letters and phone calls for even more scams, and usually end up getting sucked back into yet another scam.

Now, once upon a time, telemarketing was limited to just household phones... landlines, if you will. However, the rise of mobile communication, such as cell phones, has led to people like telemarketers or scam artists getting even more numbers, and worse, direct communication. For instance, I remember when I was a little girl, my mom or dad ended up answering the phone all the time. They dealt with the telemarketers, and were able to protect our house from them. Less than 10 years later, most of our family has cellphones, and now we're getting calls to our respective phones. What used to be a household nuisance has now become a personal problem.

So, what exactly can be done about these annoying people? Well, one of the first things you can do is register your phone number on the National Do Not Call list. You can register by phone or online. It'll take about a month for it to fully take effect, but after that, you should see the number of telemarketing calls you receive lowered significantly.

But what if you receive a call and want to find out where it's from? Well, there's a lot of online sites that'll allow you to search for numbers. Some will even let you write a complaint. Sites like this include callferret.com, callercomplaints.com and whocallsme.com.

While I doubt telemarketing will end anytime soon, at least people have a way to combat the annoying calls. Hopefully in the future we won't have to deal with aggravations like these. In the meantime, use common sense when dealing with them, and you should be fine.

Sources:
http://caeaudio.com/callsystem.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Telemarketer

https://www.donotcall.gov/

Halo Red vs Blue: A Review

A few months ago, while I was home for Winter Break, I began searching for something to watch on YouTube. Somehow I managed to stumble across the Roosterteeth channel and discovered their Halo: Red vs Blue series. Now, generally speaking, I'm not a huge fan of machinima videos; as one person said (and I don't remember who), they're generally hastily thrown together and aren't very interesting or good. Halo: Red vs Blue, however, is different.

In this series, you follow the escapades of two Halo teams in the "Blood Gulch," remote box canyon in the middle of nowhere. One team is red, and the other- you guessed it- is blue. Both have a hatred towards the other, but other than that, they have no clue why they're fighting.

The red team starts off with four main characters: Sarge, Grif, Lopez and Simmons. Sarge is the the Sergeant, the highest ranking person in the canyon. He's got a blind hatred for the blues and often concots psychopathic battle plans to take them out. He is a true military man and throughout the series, he speaks with a heavy Southern Accent. An interesting addition to his personality, Sarge is somewhat of a mad scientist, having built a robot. His armor color in the series is red.

Next we'll look at Private First Class Dick Simmons, who's referred to by his surname in the series. Simmons is one of the first two characters we see in the series (the second one being Grif). He is basically the second-in-command for the Red team and constantly sucks up to Sarge, playing the role of the team syncophant. Simmons generally plays the level-headed and sensible guy in the series. When Sarge and Grif come up with some crazy theory or plan, Simmons is usually the one to tell them that they're wrong, only to be told he is uncreative or just flat out wrong. Though he can be seen as the most stable character on the show, he does have his faults. Simmons has been known to breakdown and behave irrationally when things go wrong. During the series, Simmons wears maroon armor.

In the beginning of the series, we also meet Dexter Grif, who is almost like a polar opposite to Simmons. Grif is loud, lazy and at times, cowardly. It is safe to say that no one on his team likes him. He's indulgent (he enjoys eating bacon flavored marshmallows and "smoking in his helmet") and seems to thrive off of melodrama. Grif is brash and doesn't hesitate to insult someone who could easily kill him. Also, he tends to join Sarge in concocting ludicrous theories. Many of Grif's less desirable traits cause problems for the Red Team. Because of this (or perhaps despite this) Grif ends up being the scapegoat for the Red Team. Sarge ends up blaming him for everything that goes wrong, whether it's Grif's fault of not. In the series, Grif is shown wearing orange armor.

Finally, we meet Lopez la Pesado, or Lopez the Heavy. Lopez is a robot built by Sarge. In the beginning, he is completely silent. However, he eventually gets a voice card installed in him. Unfortunately, Sarge neglects to ground himself when installing it, and a static shock damages the card, resulting in Lopez being able to only speak in monotone Spanish. His armor in the series varies, going from brown to cobalt.

Private Leonard L. Church is one of the first members of the Blue team that we meet. From the beginning, we learn that Church is angry. He doesn't like his teammembers, his job or where he is. He frequently expresses frustration with another teammate, Tucker. At times, he can be extremely vulgar. He tends to have little patience and can get upset over almost anything. During much of the season, Church is a ghost, having been killed in the first season. He frequenly possesses the bodies of others, and has been known to be "scared out of his body." In Red vs Blue, he is shown wearing colbalt armor, but is white when he is a ghost.

When we meet Church, we also meet Private First Class Lavernius Tucker. Tucker tends to have many characteristics similar to those of a teenage boy. He is sarcastic, rude and obsesses over women. Like Grif, he tends to be lazy, doesn't enjoy his job and will often stall to avoid going into battle. He often jumps to conclusions because he seems to lack common sense. Tucker's armor is Cyan.

Now, while this series would probably be entertaining enough with the two teams blowing each other to smithereens, we all know that probably wouldn't be too entertaining. Therefore, in the beginning of the first season, we're introduced to three more characters.

The Red team gains a new member, Private Franklin Delano Donut. Donut tends to be quite gullible, being sent on a fool's errand in the first episode he appears in. He tends to sometimes creep his other teammates out (ex: by calling shotgun's lap after someone calls shotgun for the Warthog... jeep... thing) and often his sexuality is questioned. When he first appears, Donut wears standard issue red armor, but it is later changed to pink (or "lightish red" as he calls it).

The Blue team also gets new members: Private Michael J. Caboose and Tex. Caboose is seen as the most awkward member of the Blue team. He seems to be constantly detached from reality, often making random comments that are only vaguely relevant to the topic at hand. Over the course of the series, Caboose's intelligence (or lackthereof) only continues to decline as several unfortunate events plague him. He wears blue armor during the series.

Tex, however, is significantly more bright than Caboose. She's a freelance mercenary who's not officially a member of the Blue team, but is associated with them. Generally speaking, Tex is the meanest character on the show, and is completely lethal. However, there are also times where she's nice, though those moments are rare. In the series, she wears black steel armor.

Like I said before, watching these two teams blow each other up would be relatively interesting for maybe two episodes, but then it would get boring. This is where Red vs Blue comes out superior over all other machinimas. Red vs Blue actually has a complex plot, and while there is some senseless killing in it, the bloodshed isn't the main focus of the series. Instead, we're sent into an adventure that includes an evil AI named O'Malley, a slightly annoying medic named Doc, a few bombs and another canyon that contains two equally zealous teams of soldiers. The entire series is a parody of first-person-shooter games, military life and science fiction films. The humor is dry (which is fine with me) and the running gags ingenious.

And speaking of the running gags, personally, they are hilarious. One of the ones first seen is Sarge's ability to build robots, and the Red team's reliance on that. However, even the Blue team eventually begins to rely on that ability, as seen when Tucker asks Donut to get Sarge to build him a new body after he gets wounded. Donut even acknowledges the gag, stating, "we can't. We're out of parts because we overused that joke."

Another running gag seen in the show is Caboose's lack of intelligence. Quite often, he asked questions about things people assume others know (ex: the importance of a flag). This lack of intelligence often leaves him as the scorn of the other characters, and Sarge puts it best when he states that O'Malley (the evil AI who gets in Caboose's head) "took some of the furniture when he left… and the carpet… and the drapes… and I wouldn't expect to get that deposit back, if y'know what I mean."

Various other running gags are seen throughout the series, and essentially each character has one. They range in size and subject and are seen in almost each episode. If it's not Donut's and his armor color, questionable sexuality and lack of a sense of direction, then it'll be Tucker's dislike of the teleportation machine (it covers his armor in what seems to be soot and is apparently painful) or his innate ability to get knocked out by friend and foe alike. Or perhaps it would be Grif constantly questioning Simmons's ethnicity, Church's inability to shot anyone with a sniper rifle, or Grifs armor color (is it yellow or is it orange?). Regardless, the running gags in the show are rather amusing, and are used in a way that they don't get old.

Another thing that I enjoy about this series is how it's done. During the first few episodes, the opening was a bit boring. However, Roosterteeth soon had "The Blood Gulch Blues" playing in the opening credits of each episode. And yes, the voiceovers in Red vs Blue is a little rough compared to the other spinoff series, but all things considered, I think the acting more than makes up for it.

Now, I'm not going to give away the entire plot of the series. Why? Well, because
1. That would ruin the show for you
and
2. I don't know the entire plot.

"Why?" you may ask. Well, Roosterteeth has only released 3 of the 5 seasons on Youtube, and between you and me, I'm not going to pay to see the other two seasons. I'll patiently wait for them to release those as well. From what I've seen, though, it's a very good series. I've even gotten my brother into it, and that's saying something.

If you want to check out the first 3 seasons and the PSAs/Extras, head on over to Roosterteeth's Youtube site at http://www.youtube.com/user/roosterteeth?blend=1&ob=4 or at their website at http://www.roosterteeth.com.

Sources:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_vs._Blue

Also, if you want to see some of the funnier quotes in the series, head on over to the Wikiquote page! :)